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Tuesday, 4 December 2012

hai huku hai huku haiku

life truly has put its best foot forward. i always feel this every december  - the magical month jesus and i were born ;) - well how else do you expect a saggi to talk abt how great her birth month is!?

just a few days back it was a chaotic november morning when i sat scratching my dry scalp - postured like victor hugo - for some idea to rumble down. and it did rumble and mumble - above my head. clouds snuggled up close to each other and poured down as raindrops. beautiful weather to drink hot cuppas and write poetry had me do some hai huku hai huku haikus until my friends came all armed and knocked on my door - asking me to stop haikooing or be shot between my eyes.

i will share just one of the rain-centric haikus... b4 u too run for your life or try to kill me:

dead of the night hears the rain drumming down again/ 
i listen to the song of my dancing thoughts/
wrapped in a winter warming up under my quilt

tired of gaping at the clouds, the rains and people running for cover on the streets... i soaked in the tingling warmth of soothing 'lavender bath crystals' while the molten arms of the candles dripped its warm silky wax to touch the frozen bath tiles. it must have been still raining outside as i let my songs escape in full throat. lucky me - no one was there to mess my blissful me time. after the long bath, and a warm cuppa... some violent thoughts pelted down my poor brain. it couldn't handle that chaos on a romantic day. what violent thoughts you may ask? well so violent that i rather not talk about them. but they disappear if i resort to substance abuse - i mean pure hot filter coffee here my friend. it is abuse after a few cups as they say to every coffee-holic.

"every situation in life is meant to be solved," said a wise friend. like 12 cups can be cut down to 4!!!

today a random chat invoked some belly dance tunes. i put on the music and swayed instead of stretching to tear up yogic postures. mid day workouts help keep fit, rather keep spondylitis away for good. this also helps clear the head if you think you have had too much coffee already.

i am not a yogi (spiritually well-disciplined to seek higher wisdom). i am a bhogi (one who loves to enjoy life). no matter how close i get to spiritualism it bugs me when i can't have my dance going on. i am torn between the usual - discipline-ness and randomness. discipline helps me be the perfect person everyone loves and randomness just pulls the plug out! such is life.

i cant but get rid of the odds [obsessive compulsive disorders] of keeping things in order. am glad the month of november saw less of the tidying up cos i was at my random best. until something shook me up from deep below - buried in the depth of my consciousness - a guilty thought - of breaking a promise made to healthy living. aah! just that ntn else if you may think what the drama was leading to. it is the extra coffees that keep me wide awake. my friends have begun to call me an owl... not just for facial resemblance with the nocturnal being.

i am not ready to believe yet that 'giving up' is the way to be. i want to hold on to some few things i cherish from the past. like the rain memories. the filter coffee. winter mornings. long chats with friends. cuddling under the quilt way after day break. reading random books.

this morning i also came across another wonderful concept of 'emotional cuddling'. it was on somebody's fb status update. having been a dog lover all my life i can understand this 'cuddly aspect' more than any other form of physical proximity or gesture to care. i agree that emotional cuddling [not mollycoddling] is what fastens us to those people who love us. what a beautiful thought it is. very randomly perfect for the saggi me.

though i wish to, i really cannot blog about my recent interviews. i will tell you quickly why. first of all i don't think that it matters what i think abt it once it is out in the public. secondly, like a friend pointed out i may end up 'stuttering and muttering - these media people'. they have carried much nonsense about me. made me sound like some flossy abu dhabian socialite. they who? some concierge magazine.

except for that one interview all others are not so bad and are on my website [i.e. if my bangalore team has opened their mails].

note for irritating buggers: for those who like to pretend you have no clue on what am up to these days... or if u think i am getting way too much exposure/money for any [humble] artist... or if u think my blog is doing (an undercover) PR for myself - u bet u r bloody rt! but why undercover my bugger friend? it may be so for you but i am a true saggi - honestly honest, proud of who i am and very randomly busy doing what i love to whether you like/approve it or not.

note for my loving darlings: i know, you know how much i love you, whether i write that out or miss saying that when we catchup. thanks for being there always. hugs for helping me stay as good as i am.