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Thursday, 1 September 2011

Maidless mornings

When I was a teenager, she was second to mom – our stay-in maid. She had everything ready before we woke up and made sure no one was searching for anything.

I have grown up/always been with these helpful people around, all my life, and we never called them by their name. They were called either chechi or aunty or bai, depending on their age/spoken language.

Off late I had this strange realisation - life could have been different if they wr not around. We would have grown up more independently and well-aware than with these helpful hands that reached all corners – of the house, sometimes even our lives/souls.

I am not against help as such. But people who are hired for help – when we must manage the mess that we create for our own happy/sad sake.

A big house, a large lawn, a swimming pool – does not mean you can’t do what you can do. The only excuse for a paid help is probably age. When you grow so old that you can barely bend to pick something. Or when you have an actively exploring toddler and a fulltime job to handle at the same time.

Today, a friend in her 30s, complained of a maidless morning and I had so many thoughts running in my head on how people juxtaposition their lives around this super-active other woman, who will come an fix their daily routines and lives.

I also have a few friends who are not ‘keen to cook’ or ‘keen to clean’. Well, as human beings can we live without food and hygiene? If we are healthy and young enough, why can’t we take care of our basic needs without another person’s help?

One of the good but difficult things in life, I have learnt by living away from home - in residential school hostels, college hostels and as an independent girl in a large city is, to just be disciplined at all times – whether you have a good mood or not – to maintain a healthy routine. Not that I was always disciplined if left all by myself - i have had my mood swings and the mess around - but I could not let it rule my life, for more than a couple of hours may be, when I would stand up again and clear it all out. I have always fought to be completely independent of these ‘dependency’ worries. and i dont have a grt story to share why i do this.

I really don’t buy the emerging economy’s ‘helping the lower strata’ explanation for employing a 'servant' at home. but I am yet to find the perfect answer. Is there a perfect answer – I am not sure :)

But I can assure you - today I am happier having maidless mornings - part-time or full-time - in complete privacy. I was never used to searching for things in the morning with them around... nor do I do that without them around because its only our own basic selves who keep things in or out of its place - rt?

Why is it so difficult to leave a place as is? Ok, the tub gets dirty when u take bath, but what makes you think its over once you are done with cleaning up yourselves? the act is not complete if you leave behind the mess, to accumulate until someone else comes and clears. Its defntly lack of awareness or something else that we are looking for when we do employ them - the maids. Whatever it must must be - it doesnt fancy me at the moment. May be on a later day when am less organised I may have to bite my words on these stupid findings - safe to leave this as is for now - i guess.

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