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Sunday, 30 January 2011

letting my thoughts fly

there are plenty of reasons why i blog. today i have an unusual reason. i have got a headache. and a story to tell. i really have little idea what the story will be like. i am not sure how many of its layers i have been able to define so far.

i rcvd a mail fwd in the morning. it was defining a 'hater'. and was supposedly written by america's prominent poet mary angleou. she is one of my favourites too - so unlike scrolling down to find if this one also comes with a 'please fwd this to 8 of your friends' i read it closely. and it had a serious massage. it was warning us of haters and warning us of being one.

now the headache. that has little to do with the mary's [little lamb?] story.

it is the first day of my 'diet'. yes i too am on it. need to shed 5 kilos to get to my healthy bmi. did i ever know this day would come?

i was the skinny [lamb?] one at home. yeah, that was a long long time ago.

so why/what am i blogging exactly? guess it is just to remind myself that i am on a bloody diet - that lets me eat everything that is healthy. but if i do come unprepared to tackle a long day - with just 2 slices of low fat cheese and a bunch of grapes - i sure will have a stupid headache. wont i? what was i thinking?

all i can think are the gulab jamuns all the way from pakistan next to my desk. a colleague bk from vacation promises makki ki roti and saag tomorrow. what the hell am i thinking now?

i should let my thoughts fly to the flamingos i met yesterday. aha! i already feel better. so later then, on the feathered folks.

Thursday, 27 January 2011

five years... inshallah!

2006 jan 26 is when we got married. it has been a good ride so far and i am guessing with little guessing that he completes me totally.

i am damn glad to have ran into him. wait! actually he ran into me - literally [without any bollywood ost in the background though!]
it was not so filmy if u delete the theatrics. it was an inter-religious wedding that took place in a church with few temple-goers attending it from my side. so you can call it a controversial one in a reserved set up. well not so reserved cos i was not asked to convert. thank god for let me keep my god! y am i turning to theatrics - i am not the most pious one. i just love the lamps, flowers and the idea that a supreme being is there. i am the least god fearing one... cos i love my god. i think he lives within me and that he is strong - very strong.

so it is five years... and as the priest had asked us... we made sure there is god and his presence felt in our lives - in our homes. not exactly through idols though. there r fewer weekly masses that we have missed... and fewer ritualistically used-to days that we havent observed - from both religions. deepu is a catholic and i am a hindu. but that has not made any great difference - we have both angels and gods looking after so well... in a land where every one says inshallah!
mabrook to us... inshallah!

Saturday, 22 January 2011

a spring clean find this winter

long long ago i was almost blind... yes quiet literally without aid - glasses i mean. the blog below was written to be poseted long bk but got tucked under for reasons only god will know [cos back then i had not started eating almonds regularly - poor memory. lol!] . so this was an entry before i corrected myopia with the help of surgery - in november 2007. and i find it hillarious... those days when i could see little. thankfully today am seeing fine. i am technically not so short sighted - if i may say that please.

so here is that old rambling that i found while spring cleaning my docs today.

"the day i forgot my spectacles at home was quite an eye opener. for once i realised that i am not just simply blind but i am 'as blind as a bat'. i would not know whom to smile to when i entered the floor. i am highly myopic, so all that i could make out were wavering images. no clarity at all. i could not make out if someone was smiling or winking at me. i waved to a colleague who was waving to someone else. i realised this as he crossed me and stuck a conversation with the one who was eagerly waving to.

a colleague who saw me inching closer to me computer screen said an other inch and i would be sucked into the computer. he probably thought i was so much more engaged in some interesting work that i am assigned. did he know i was struggling so hard?

to dial a number i had to stoop far beyond what others would do. my secret could not have been kept for long as i kept squinting my eye for a clearer picture. it was a lot of strain. i got a headache soon, which i fixed with a double duty coffee. but that was temporary. there was still a lot more hours to pass like this before the day came to a close.

i was left wondering how it will be if i were to walk out on the streets without spectacles. will i ever be able to flag down an empty cab? that is if i make out if that which is coming close to me is a cab and not a private car with some wrong man in it.

myopia is a very common condition which many of us have. and it is generally fixed by wearing glasses. the fashion conscious wear contact lenses, as they can take a little more hassle to feel and look good. contacts are not for me. unless it is a special day or an attire with which glasses wont go. but i cant keep them for long. the very effort is a little more than a hassle. finally i end up convincing myself, what’s the big deal, who says i must wear contacts? i must just have the confidence - to be blind enough to the world!"

lol! and just a week ago i was almost offended by a new guy in the workplace... who did not acknowledge a greeting... i had totally forgotten those myopic days. sorry pal - i should have empathised better. but i guess it is a good idea to get the vision fixed. no better joy... o boy!

another slice of me

today i have a special reason to blog. early today an old colleague came on chat and said that i must read her blog. she is very dear to me so i read with a 'dear eye'. and guess what. she had dedicated a para on me. was i happy or not? i did not knwo how to react. i wanted to say thanks but i said - omg! and i did not have words to say anything further. so i waded into another topic. yeah! there are days when i am embarrassed too.

well just a while ago, another, older colleague was on chat. she was looking fwd to create her own blog. and while we chatted i hesitantly... not so hesitantly... despite the not so perfect blog it is... shared the link with her. probably to just tell her in other words that there is no need to think so much to start a blog!? i donno sure enough what i was thinking. i shared the link. then i worried. y the hell did i do that. they r not clean enough. y do i need to project that i start n finish things in such a non-thinking fashion?
well guess what. she came back saying they r good! my blogs are good! and that i must just stick to my style - cos it is me. was i happy or not [yes that is a repetitive - i know!] sometimes u have to clap twice - to echo the fact that u gave another big chance for urself to be. just u. i mean just me.

Sunday, 16 January 2011

glad @ mattar marsam

that is the name of an art gallery in satwa. a villa turned gallery. an interesting one. deepu loved the open space and calmness - the settings that were perfect for art and art-lovers.
so finally the new year has rolled in. after kilos of cake hogging and party making last few weeks it was now time for some cold bouts. achooo! that is how the day started. but ended marvellously well.
went to mattar marsam to see an office mate's works. could not see him but met an inetersting emirati couple - artists. one of them will be curating a show starting feb 1. and i am one of the participants of that show. and thus officially finally i do part take in an art event in the uae... and that is the good news this year... at its very beginning :)
glad am i.